HomeEditorial CommentUKWENDISELANA LOKUTHATHANA — PART 3

UKWENDISELANA LOKUTHATHANA — PART 3

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LAMHLANJE izinto sezaxubana zaba yingxubevange, ingxabangxoza engaqondakaliyo ukuthi isuka ngaphi iye ngaphi.

Kudala ilizwe lisemi lizinzile kwakujatshulwa kusendiselwana njalo kuthathwana kukuhle kunjeya.

Njalo kwakusaziwa ukuthi abakobani bathathana labakobani, isithunzi sikamakoti lapho angene khona siye ngokuthi uphuma kobani. Abezolo babe ngakhangela okwalamuhla bathi ngamandlwane .

Kungenani kuyathathwana kuyiwa phambili.

Kuthiwa aluba ufuna ukubona ukuthi umtshado ugidwa njani lokuthi umakoti wemukelwa njani hamba ko Godlwayo, koMahlab’ayithwale, uzabuya usuvuleke amehlo. Kodwa uGodlwayo lowo umthimba kawazi.

Wazi umtshado lapho okufungelwana khona amanga kusasa umntanomuntu azibone esetshelwe ngamanzi njengenhlanzi .

Umthimba uyema kodwa umtshado uphetshulwa ngumoya. Omalokazana balamuhla kabasakwazi ukuthi bayenda, bathi bayatshada labesilisa kabasakuqakisi ukuthi bayathatha, labo bathi bayatshada.

Umakoti ungena ekhaya engaselabo ubugugu bayizolo.

This introductory part is meant to touch the heart of the marriage problem. There is a conflict between the old and the new. However, the old ways have not been totally abandoned.

Traditional approaches are still made to negotiate with the girl’s parents to marry their daughter. Many parents still follow the custom of ukucola which culminates in the “sending off” of their daughter after a “soul-rending” ukulaya by the close relatives.

Poor girl, she cries her heart out. Her brother will then lead her away (forever and Amen — akube njalo!) through the cattle kraal to join her umthimba waiting for her outside the homestead.

At this point, the umthimba may sing the dirge:
Salani kahle baba lomama,
Sengisiya kondliwa ngumfazi ongasumama/ ongangizaliyo.

These are umthimba practices and not umtshado. Umtshado is too European. When the umtshado things have been done the woman is umlobokazi and the man umyeni. Hence forth she will be referred to as umakoti.

The climax of it all is when umakoti with her umthimba arrive at her new home, the family home of her umyeni.

People just go wild with rejoicing — running about, ululating, jumping, shouting, “Woza laye ! Kuzwa ! Woza laye mfana!” Usetshaya umqalo kube njeya!
Any of the following songs (or all) may be sung:
Londoloza, londolozel’umama. Angakudin’ubuyise
Lingabomtshel’ukuloya/ ubukhwele. Ungabotshaya’ubulale.

Samthatha ebumnyameni , Samusa ekukhanyeni (groom’s party)
Samsusa ekukhanyeni, Samletha ebumnyamenti, ( Bride’s party)

iliphathele nant’igolide. Namt’igolide lesiliva.

UMaNcube, uMaNcube uligolide . Yen’uligolide lesiliva.

Thabanini nant’igolide.
(Ibhensi yakhona, suka wena!)

Qoki sangena – Sangena, Sangena , Sangena.
Thina Sangena-sangena, sangena, sangena.

When all the feasting has been done makoti and myeni come out to sit in the open to receive gifts. The umthimba sings:
Makoti phuma sikudlalele.
Phuma makoti . Eha, a –elele, iyahamb’njin’ebilayo. Akuqali ngawe.
(A dirge) Londolozela, Vuya! Ntandan’kababa, Vuya! Kalayise, Vuya, Vuya!
When it is umtshado there is no room for any of this. Kudubuka iziginci kuqhaqhazele imitshitshimbo kutshise phansi.
O, he-e-e ! Lafa elihle !

Umakoti usengenile ekhaya. During all the activities and procedures she is the centre of attraction.

One has not fully participated in all the activities until they have come close to umlobokazi to see what she is like, what she is wearing (her wedding gown, her veil, her shoes and, of course, her ring).

People will remark not only about her dress and other things she is wearing, but about her manner as well — how she sits up, how she looks at people, how she responds to those who greet her.

Hawu bantu, even how she breathes! Wahlolelwa umntanabantu! (How do you say this is English?).

At the conclusion of the celebrations, usually the next morning when the umthimba has been fed and is ready to depart, important formalities are followed.

Relatives of the groom’s family come together to give special thanks to the groom’s parents for providing the feast.

They sing:
ENyathi, siyabonga thina.
Sithi, “Dank’yu veri matshi, (Not “Thank you very much”).
Then, Umakoti ngowethu, Siyabonga thina
Sithi, “Dank’yu veri matshi”

Senior relatives of the groom and of umakoti are now invited to gather together indoors for a gruelling session with the groom and umakoti. Such as, “Ndaba mntanomnewethu, lamuhla usukhulile.

Umgcine kuhle umntanomuntu. Kasifuni ukubona izinyembezi kuye. Kakumelanga alambe kumbe aswele. Uyezwa?

MANTINI: (Uninomncinyane kamakoti) Lomchilo, nguwe ozikhetheleyo ukuza lapha koNyathi. Kusasa singezwa kuthiwa sekutheni. Yazi abakwenuzala, yibo asebe nguyihlo lonyoko. Nakekela indoda yakho uyihloniphe. Futhi yazi ukuthi umuntu oyindoda yinja. Yona iyantshontsha amaqanda loba ngawakobani. Ungachithi umuzi ngalokho. Uyangizwa?

Khathesi-ke umakoti usesekhaya. Bathi abeNkosi kakuselarivesi. (Now the bride is at home — her home and there is no going back).

Now, the next and last episode of the celebrations is absolute pandemonium, ezamasi phela. Read the next issue.

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