LAST Saturday, we attended the Comedy Roast of Saimon Mambazo-Phiri at the Bulawayo Theatre, where the panel took turns trading jibes.
A visibly intoxicated Maxine Tekere, a radical feminist, co-founder of the Pusheka Girl movement, and Sandra Ndebele’s PA, proceeded to embarrass herself and everyone around her.
She was loud, uncontrollable, extremely noisy, and smoked like a chimney inside the theatre, creating an unwarranted sideshow.
It was a stark reminder of the necessity to check not just one's IQ,, but also their social and emotional quotients.
My dear, that bizarre behaviour was below the belt and uncalled for.
Try dressing in fully fitting blouses next time as well; you are a public mentor for so many young women at Pusheka Girl.
Back on the main stage, I was let down by the roast panel, which seemed to hold back its sharpest bars for Mambazo.
Even he noted that they seemed to fear him.
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Gents, this was your one chance to have a go at "Topi" and get away with it!
Cringing for days
Ncncncnc, you can imagine my total disbelief, disgust, and heartbreak upon hearing horrible rumours about a local comedian.
A friend confided that several girls have opened up to him about how the guy who surname starts with an M gropes them backstage during play rehearsals.
Apparently, he has a nasty habit of touching girls inappropriately without their consent and dismisses it as "just playing."
My friend, that is a deadly game you are playing.
You are dancing at the gates of jail.
We do not want to wake up tomorrow to a documentary about how people survived you.
I shudder at the thought. Change your ways! Change your ways, I say!
Bulawayo Eats Awards
Oh, how my mouth salivated at the news of the looming Bulawayo Eats Awards!
The cat is finally out of the bag: next month, we will witness the best in our city's gastronomy world being rewarded.
According to the organisers, they will recognise leading restaurants, butcheries, waiters, and bakeries, among others.
This is a fantastic initiative that will encourage better quality service in a city where most providers act like they are doing consumers a favour.
Alas, an up-to-standard talkshow
The more I listen to local radio, the prouder I become. Last Wednesday, my ever-hectic schedule allowed me to tune into Nust FM, and I listened to The Lounge, an arts and culture show hosted by Mbulelo Mpofu.
I must say, the order and smooth flow of his conversations with guests impressed me.
You remember last time I complained about how most talk shows and podcasts seem to be produced by drunk children?
Often, hosts are clueless about their guests or who should lead the conversation, resulting in the noise of bickering children.
Hai no, this time they did well.
Keep up the good work, Bulawayo omuhle.
This is how things are done. Earn your space in the national grid.
Congratulations Innoe
Let me end by expressing heartfelt congratulations to one of our own mentees here at Southern Eye, former intern Innocent Magondo.
He graduated from Nust this past Friday and won a prize, which earned him the privilege of being capped by the chancellor — who is also the state President, Emmerson Mnangagwa.
Well done, Innoe!
We appreciate good ambassadors; a good student surpasses his master.
Go out there and set the world alight with your flame.
Alright, my friends, that is my cue. Remember to be good. If you can’t be good, be safe. Follow me on Instagram @SouthernEye / @SE.Until next time, keep telling all your friends to follow and tag me, kikikikiki!
