EVERYDAY all forms of media are littered with stories of sexually-abused people, particularly young girls and women.
It looks like we are living in times where sex is used as a tool to destroy other people’s lives.
This is total abuse of sex which was created for a godly and fulfilling purpose. It is amazing to note how the world at large condones such abuse and embraces it as a way of life and even human culture.
Nowadays this abuse of sex is regarded as human rights or democratic rights and millions all over the world are caught up in this gravy train. What perhaps they do not understand is the living reality of self-abuse in all these so-called rights.
In short, you are abusing yourself when you abuse sex. It does not matter which way you approach it, abusing sex is self-abuse. You use your body to have sex. When you are abusing sex which is done through your body and is in the body, you are abusing your body.
Let me for now show you some of these abuses. Never mind what the political world says about some of them. They are total abuse.
Prostitution is abuse of sex and it’s self-abuse. Sex is never meant to be sold or commercialised. It does not matter the reasons given for prostitution, it remains abusive in all its intentions and colours.
Reasons given could be politically and economically clear, but the truth remains the same that indulging in prostitution is abusive of sex and self. By the way, buying and selling sex is prostitution. Those who buy it are abusing themselves as well as abusing the ones selling it. The whole agenda of this “project” is abuse.
Homosexuality is abusing sex and self-abuse. I know that it receives so much attention by some human rights activists and some politicians the world over.
This does not take away the abusive nature of the actions. You are abusing your body, abusing the other person and abusing God who created your body.
Have you noticed that some of the most powerful people in world politics who advocate for these actions are themselves not involved?
They, for political reasons, legalise your self-abuse and give you constitutional rights to abuse yourself and destroy yourself in the process. Who is fooling who?
Rape is abuse of sex and is self- abuse. How do you steal sex? Sex was never meant to be violent. Sex is about mutual concert and about peace of mind and body.
Rape is a violent abuse of sex. What the rapist does not know is that they are also abusing themselves in the process. There is so much violence in the manner the world engages in sex these days.
Even in marriage, the only God-ordained place for sex, there is violence and abuse.
I wonder why there is so much attack on this function of the human body.
Do you realise how our lives suddenly evolve around sex? We are preoccupied so much we just want to indulge. The sexual function of the human body has become the central function and influences lives. This is sad and leads to so much destruction and pain.
Naturally, every person is supposed to have control over their sexual functions and not the function controlling the person.
If we all understood the effects of sex on our bodies, we would try our best to do sex the appropriate way.
One of Africa’s renowned authors Ngugi wa’Thiongo, in his book The Devil on the Cross writes that “women’s thighs have become tables where contracts are signed”.
Nowadays, not only business contracts are signed, but lives are lost also. Families are destroyed. Businesses are destroyed.
Communities and nations are destroyed. Dreams are lost and the world’s biggest scandals are drawn and executed there. This is abuse of the highest order.
There are many other ways sex has been abused and is abused in our communities.
Have you not read about scandals such as having sex for bread, food, promotion and many more?
Sexual abuse in whatever name has a bitter end. I know that we look at the physical side of things more than we are supposed to.
As long as you are not caught, you think you are safe. As long as you did not get an infection you think you are safe.
As long as it is legalised by your government and is in your Constitution, you think you are safe. This is the physical side of things which is very limited and misleading.
Have you ever bothered to find out the Spiritual side of things? Before you are a physical being, you are a spiritual being. There is need to stop at some point and look at the spiritual side of your being and then you will understand issues differently and engage with wisdom.
I will come back with more details. For now keep thinking.
Kilton Moyo is the author of The Sex Trap and a guidance and counselling consultant. You can call or WhatsApp him on
+263 775 337 207